Jo and I spent the weekend just gone on a tourist jaunt to London. Which went something like this:

Saturday

Morning: Virgin Pendolino from Manchester Piccadilly, tube across town to base-camp: Fuller’s Mad Hatter, Blackfriars.

Afternoon: Quick stroll down to Borough Market. Alas, The Rake was hammered, hadn’t read Mark Dredge’s review of Brew Wharf yet, so passed that one by. Dodged a rain shower by nipping into The Wheatsheaf, situated in the cellars of the old Hop Exchange. Perfectly pleasant pint of Phoenix Arizona (I know, all the way to London to drink beer from up the road in Rochdale, eh? You can take us Northerners out of the North…)

Also wandered into Utobeer, brilliant little place (about the same size as Beer Ritz), cracking selection of fantastic beers (more on that in next New Arrivals post). They should open a branch in Manchester, definitely.

Evening: Train out to Bromley, visiting good friends Sam and Chris. Takeaway from Tamasha – ordered something that turned out to be rabbit in creamy, lightly-spiced sauce – accompanied by a couple of bottles of Westerham‘s Little Scotney Pale Ale – red-brown, deliciously malty – then a more-than generous measure of Laphroig Quarter Cask (cheers, Chris!) Got back about midnight, extremely full and happy but too late for the hotel bar. Never mind.

Sunday

Morning / Afternoon: Weekend Tourist Destination #1: Hampton Court Palace. Good few hours mooching through medieval / baroque palaces; peering into display cases, suitably impressed by the architecture, generally soaking up the culture. Almost tempted by King’s Table Ale at lunch’ but £3.50 for 4% bottled session bitter helped decide against (bit early in the day and hot weather to boot). Had ice-cream instead. Two scoops. Also almost temped by leather tankard; which smelled great, looked pretty nifty. Flipped the thing over, saw £40.00 price tag (£5 cheaper online, apparently). Sanity quickly restored.

(Also, I spotted this fella in the courtyard, perched on top of so-called “wine fountain”… but I reckon I know a happy ale-drinker when I see one:)

Evening: Train back to town, quick tube ride up to Covent Garden. Dropped in on The Porterhouse for steak dinner (served with mountain of straw chips and rather pleasant bernaise sauce). Few pints of probably the best stouts to be found in London (well, outside of Greenwich, that being Meantime territory, obviously). Jo went for Plain Porter, I sampled Oyster Stout, switched to the Wrasslers XXXX for number two, stuck with that for the duration. Thought about Brain Blasta (strong ale, 7% ABV or so), decided to remain coherent instead.

(Incidentally, the Porterhouse has the best interior decor in the world. If you’ve been there, you’ll know exactly what I mean: floor-to-ceiling cabinets filled with the most fascinating selection of bottled beers you’re likely to see in your life. Here’s a quick snapshot, which I hope I’ve been able to capture okay, given the suitable atmospheric conditions:

Love the place. Absolutely love it. They should also open a branch in Manchester, most definitely.)

Back to Mad Hatter for quick night-cap. Choice of several Fuller’s ales, went for London Pride (I fancied something with more bite than Seafarer’s Ale looked like it might deliver and I’d been disappointed by Chiswick bitter on a couple of occasions. The Pride was okay, but nothing special – honestly it really could’ve done with a sparkler to liven it up a bit, it was flat as the proverbial witch’s what-not – but perhaps I should have gone for the ESB. I’ll know better next time.)

Monday

Morning / Afternoon: Dropped suddenly-rather-heavy bags (again: next New Arrivals piece…) at Euston Left Luggage. Wandered round to Euston Square, jumped back on tube, headed down to Weekend Tourist Destination #2: Tower of London. Before joining heaving throng of tourists, headed across London bridge to Butler’s Wharf in search of food. Passed site of Anchor Brewhouse; original Courage brewery, converted to apartment block (inevitably). (There was a plaque on the wall, which I duly snapped; click for a larger, more readable version:)

Next: The Tower. Apparently 2,400,000 visitors a year. Most seemed to turned up on same day as us. Can’t blame them, weather was lovely, but queue for Crown Jewels (“royal bling” as Yeoman Warder Tour Guide put it) was quite ridiculous, likewise queue for ‘Torture in the Tower’ exhibition. Skipped those; did the medieval bits, checked out display of Royal Arms and Armour (well worth a look if you’re a bit of a medieval military buff, although the £17.00 Tower entry ticket might be understandably off-putting), stuck our heads around gift shop door, checked out tourist tat. Once again, King’s Table Ale and leather tankard both called. Once again, their allure was easily resisted.

Evening: En-route back to Euston, Jo suggested stopping at that Gunmaker’s place that I keep going on about (I was only too happy to oblige). Wandered in, eyes drawn magnetically to chalk-board menu. Curses! Food plans foiled: kitchen not open until 18.30 (apparently they allow their chef time to rest, the mad, compassionate fools). Have to get back to Euston for 20.00 train (reserved single tickets, no choice). Too close to risk it.

Consolatory pint of Woodforde’s Wherry – a pleasant golden session beer with light, hoppy profile – then, half-way through pint of Kelham Island Pale Rider – stronger, slightly darker, much more pronounced hop-bite – legendary landlord Jeff appears from upper rooms, proceeds to win uber-Landlord Award. (He did this by catching sight of us out of the corner of his eye, stopping in mid-stride with an impressive double-take and then proceeding to remember not only the last time he spoke to me – which was just over a year ago – but also my name – which, to a bear of very little brain and even less useful memory like me, is pretty darn impressive, I can tell you. I introduced Jo, we chatted for a bit and then Jeff headed off to entertain his regulars, leaving us feeling thoroughly welcome and absolutely determined to head on back there the next time we’re in town. We’ll make damn sure we’re there when the kitchen is open, too.)

Definitely needed food before two-hour train journey home. Aforementioned regular helpfully suggested The Bree Louise. Bloody good idea. Back on the tube, off again at Euston Square, round corner to Bree Louise. Ordered 2x New Yorker chicken (fried breast fillet covered in bacon and cheese, pile of chips, just the ticket) washed down with utterly underwhelming pint of gravity-dispensed Nethergate Umbel Magna (I’ve had both gravity beers at the Bree Louise and Umbel Magna elsewhere and they’ve both been much better, but so it goes…) followed by pint of Rebellion Mild – smooth, nutty, dark, quite pleasant – for the road.

Train. Taxi. Home. Bed. Pretty much exhausted, but extremely happy.

(We’re already planning our next London jaunt: Brew Wharf, The Rake, Utobeer again, definitely The Gunmaker’s, definitely The Porterhouse, maybe a trip over to Greenwich… oh, and perhaps some more tourist stuff as well. But no leather tankards for me. Not at £40 bloody quid a pop…)